What Are They Doing Now?
by vipper902
Summary: Sequel of sorts to Mine is Bigger. Reviewers asked for it, you got it! Once again, Kagome and Sango over hear the boys in some...interesting conversations.


Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

Well, hello everyone! Welcome to the sequel to Mine is Bigger! First of all, wow! I can't believe how many reviews I got for that story! I would just like to thank all of you. For anyone who didn't know, at the end of the other story, the guys realized that Kagome and Sango thought they were talking about something err…wrong and inappropriate. I got so many kind reviews asking for a sequel or another chapter, so here it is. I don't think it's as funny as the first one, and it as a LOT more perverted. If you've noticed the rating is PG-13, where the other one was just PG. Warning, if you don't have a twisted mine. Anyway, innocent readers beware, your in for a scare! This is stupid, pointless, and really sick and wrong. Fun, as always.

* * *

Kagome and Sango were walking through the forest, gathering firewood. Shippo had come with them as well, since he didn't want to be left with the other four men again.

"Do you think we have enough firewood yet?" he asked.

"I don't know," Sango answered shrugging.

"I just want to stay away from camp for as long as possible," Kagome muttered.

"Me too. I mean, the guys they act…weird together."

"I know! Especially Naraku!" the miko agreed.

"What the hell is he doing here anyway?"

Both girls shrugged.

"So, what do you think those guys are doing anyway?"

- at the camp site -

"I'm going to go to the potty!" Naraku declared and stood up.

"Well gee, thank you so much for sharing," Miroku muttered dryly.

Naraku glared and then looked at Inuyasha. The hanyou stared at him innocently. When the other half demon narrowed his eyes, an understanding look passed over his face.

"I uh…I got to go to the potty too!"

"Is it just the hanyous, or does everyone feel the need to announce their bodily functions?" Sesshomaru questioned as the two stalked away.

The houshi shrugged his shoulders. He then looked over at Sesshomaru, grinning madly. He subtly began scooting closer. The youkai looked over at him, raising an eyebrow.

"What are you doing?"

"Well…we are all alone…"

"Just what are you suggesting?" he questioned.

"Oh, I think you **know **what I'm suggesting."

"Um…I don't know…" he said, a blush rising on his pale cheeks.

Miroku moved up right beside him, flashing a charming smile.

"Ah come on, Fluffy."

"Well…all right. Just be careful this time. Last time you nearly broke the damn thing."

"Oh come now Fluffy, don't you think your over-reacting?"

"No! It hurt! You were drunk and you didn't know what you were doing!"

"Well I'm not drunk now so just hold still."

The houshi reached out, only to have the youkai grab his wrist. He narrowed his golden eyes.

"You promise you'll be gentle this time?"

He rolled his eyes and nodded. "Hentai's honor!"

"All righty then!"

- at the…um…potty -

"Ohhhhhhhh….yeahhhhhhhh!"

"Am I doing it right?"

"Yessss!"

"Are you sure?"

"Stop asking questions and start concentrating!"

Inuyasha scowled at him. "I only want to know if I'm doing it right! Sheesh, I try to make this better for you and all you do is yell at me."

"I can't help it!" Naraku hissed. "Harder!"

"All right."

"Ow! Not **that **hard!"

"You said harder!"

"I didn't say tear it apart!"

"Gomen! Kami your whiny tonight."

"Oh, yes!"

- back to Sango, Kagome, and Shippo -

"Did you hear something?" Shippo asked.

"Yeah, I think so," Sango answered, peering out through the trees.

"I'll go check it out," Kagome said. (I could have swore I heard Inuyasha's voice.)

Sango nodded. "I'll go back to camp."

The two women took their separate ways. Shippo shrugged and began following Kagome.

- at the camp site -

"That feels…so…nice."

"See, I promised I would be more careful this time. You worried yourself over nothing."

"Can you blame me? I thought you were going to kill it last time!"

"Sorry," Miroku apologized. "I like it rough!"

Sesshomaru rolled his eyes. "You really are such a hentai."

"But I'm a pretty hentai!"

"Err…exactly."

"What, you don't think I'm pretty?"

"I'm not commenting on it!"

"But I'm a bishounen! I'm really pretty! And so are you!"

The youkai blinked. "You think I'm pretty?"

"Yes."

"Oh…..um….thanks then."

The houshi rolled his eyes. "Don't go flattering yourself," he said. "It's not like I'm love with you or anything. I just like to pet and stroke you!" /1/

"Doesn't everybody?"

"True."

Sango stopped dead in her tracks, her mouth hanging wide opened. (Kami!)

- back at the potty…again -

"That's it. Keep it up. You're almost done!"

"Really?"

"Hai!"

Inuyasha pouted a bit. "But this is fun!"

"Don't be such a cry baby." Smirking he added, "I'll do you next."

"But you do me all the time! You never let me play with yours!"

"Well, that's because I have more experience."

"It's not fair! I want to be the one in control sometimes!"

"You are now so shut up!" 

Grinning evilly, the hanyou stopped for a moment. "I want to do it more often."

"You do it often enough."

"Ah, but Nary-chan! Once every four times isn't enough!"

"Think about it this way, if we do this twice every day, every week, then that means you'll get to do it three or four times."

Inuyasha thought about this for a moment. "Really?"

"Hai."

"Three to four times?"

"Hai."

"You've got yourself a deal!"

Naraku grinned to himself. (The dog eared are so easily manipulated.)

Kagome stopped abruptly, causing Shippo to bump into her.

- yet again, we return to the camp site! -

"I love doing this…"

"You mean your not done yet?"

"What do you mean what do I mean?"

Sesshomaru rubbed his eyes sleepily. "I guess I kind of drifted off there…"

"What?!" the houshi asked.

"I couldn't help it!" he yelled. "It just felt so nice and relaxing. Put me right to sleep."

"Grr…I've been waiting to do this for a long time and you fall asleep? And you wonder why I'm so rough with you. It's to keep you from going to sleep on me!"

"And you say that I'm whiny," Sesshomaru said and rolled his eyes. "Look, think about it. You put I, Sesshomaru, almighty youkai Lord and bishounen to sleep. That has to count for something."

Miroku pouted. "I didn't want you to fall asleep!"

"Well I'm **sorry**!"

Sango blinked. (I don't think I'm seeing what I think I'm seeing. No, I don't. I don't think I'm seeing what I think I'm seeing because I can't think that I'm seeing what I think I'm seeing because if I think I'm see what I think I'm seeing….what am I talking about?!)

"I don't think Inuyasha would fall asleep."

"Don't you ever compare me to that stupid, dog eared, kibble eating, MC Hammer pants wearing, sailor mouthed, no shoe wearing baka!"

"I hate to point this out, Fluffy dearest, but your wearing the MC Hammer pants too."

"Shut up." He pulled away. "And don't ever touch me again!"

"But…."

"No."

"Gomen, gomen, gomen Sesshy-sama!"

"You are so not forgiven!"

Miroku rolled his eyes. "But the MC Hammer pants look better on you."

Sesshomaru turned to him, glaring suspiciously. "You mean it?"

"Hai!"

"Well, all righty then." He smiled happily.

Miroku returned the smile and reached out again.  
  
"But you still don't get to touch it."

"Curses!"

The two men looked up at the sound of stick breaking. Within moments, a distraught Sango appeared.

"Err…hello Sango…" Miroku muttered awkwardly.

"What do you think you were doing? I…"

"AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!"

The three snapped their attention towards the lake as the loud scream echoed throughout the night forest. They all jumped up and began heading towards the sound.

- again, at the potty -

"Yes! Yes! Yes! YYYEEESSS!"

"Wow! I really am good at this!" Inuyasha yelled, giggling softly.

"Maybe I really should let you do this more often…"

"Did you have to scream so loud?"

"Yes, in fact, I did."

"I think you woke up the entire country!"

"Well that's what all those women on the TV do. At least, that's what Kagome told me."

Inuyasha narrowed his eyes. "When were you talking to Kagome?"

"We weren't discussing a plan to murder Kikyo and make it look like an unfortunate smelting accident!"

"Oh…well that's good…have you been watching Goldmember lately?"

"No! I don't watch Goldmember. In fact, I don't even know who and/or what Mike Meyers is! I didn't go to the movies!"

"That's good too. It might not be such a good idea for you to leave the feudal era…"

"I did not go see Troy! I did not see Brad Pitt naked, darn it! I did **not **cry when they killed Achilles, I didn't! That was just a piece of buttered popcorn that had gotten in my eye!" 

"OK!" Inuyasha said happily. "Good!"

He sniffed the air. Wide eyed, he turned to see Kagome and Shippo standing right beside the lake.

"Err…hey guys!"

"Inuyasha?" Kagome asked. "Are you…n-naked in there?"

"What? Why the hell would I be naked with Naraku in the water whilst he moans and makes other inappropriate noises?" "Yeah," Naraku agreed. "What would we do?" 

"Then what are you doing?" Shippo questioned.

Inuyasha got out of the water, revealing that he was indeed wearing all of his clothing. Naraku then got out, revealing that he was wearing a alligator speedo. Kagome kept back a snicker as she noticed the floaties that he was wearing on his arms. Inuyasha bent down and pulled out a bottle.

"Herbal Essences," Shippo read.

"You stole my shampoo?" Kagome asked. "No!" Inuyasha answered. "He did!" 

"Only because you told me too!"

"Did not!" 

"Oh yes you did!" Naraku said. "As I remember it was, Naraku, please steal that stuff from Kagomes bag, please? I need you to wash my hair so it will be pretty and so she'll love me forever and ever and never go back to her stupid time!"

"I did not say that!"

"I have it on tape!" he said, pulling a tape recorder out from his speedo.

"Kagome? Are you all right? What's going on…" Sango trailed off. Miroku and Sesshomaru walked up behind her.

"Hey guys," Sesshomaru greeted and waved.

"Hello, brother," Inuyasha said grinning evilly.

"Hello! Wait…why are you looking at me like…no…you stay back! Naraku! Inuyasha! Don't! No!"

Miroku watched, amused, Kagome and Sango stared in shock, and Shippo as just confused as the two half demons jumped on the youkai.

"No!!!!" he cried. "Look, you got my new kimono all wet! You stupid bakas!"

Inuyasha and Naraku grinned as they moved away from him. They looked over to the houshi, who returned their smile.

"So, what did you two do while Inu-kun was washing my hair?" Naraku asked.

"He washed your hair? I thought it was the other way around?"

"We decided to switch. So, what'd you do?"

"Nothing much. Played with matches, vandalized some public property, tormented some squirrels."

The other two nodded, while Kagome just blinked. (They get stupider and stupider every story! I mean…day…)

"Oh, oh!" Miroku said happily. "And I convinced him to let me play with his soft, warm, fuzzy, big, long, huge, enormous, giant-"

Kagome and Sango again fainted.

"-fluffy."

The two hanyous gasped.

"Fluffy let you play with his fluffy?"

The houshi nodded vigorously.

"Was it just as fun as I've imagined it would be?" Naraku asked.

"Yep!"

"At least he wasn't drunk this time," Sesshomaru said. He looked down at his ruined kimono and frowned. "Stupid hanyous…"

"Drunk?" Inuyasha questioned.

"Yeah. Remember that kegger that Totosai threw last week?" Miroku asked. The two nodded. "Well, I got super duper drunk, and Fluffy was like, nearly half passed out in exhaustion."

"Let me get this straight, you got drunk, and then you saw my brother, and decided to take advantage of him and molest his fluff?"

"Well…I suppose that's one sick, twisted, perverted way you could put it."

"Oh."

Naraku bent down and tilted his head to the side. "When do you think they're going to wake up?"

"I dunno," Sesshomaru answered sleepily. "Guys, can we go back to camp now?"

"I wasn't molesting it," Miroku said. "I was only playing with it!"

"Err…what should we do with those two hentais over there?" Inuyasha asked.

"What makes you call them hentais?" Shippo asked.

"Well obviously," Sesshomaru said, yawning, "They thought, once again, that we were doing something wrong and inappropriate when really we were doing very innocent and stupid things. So they have perverted minds, and therefore are hentais."

"Yeah, unless the author just wrote them that way," Naraku pointed out.

The other three shrugged.

"So what do we do with 'em?" Miroku asked.

"Sell them on E-Bay?" Naraku suggested.

"Err…no," Inuyasha said.

"Shucks."

"Let's just take a nap," Sesshomaru suggested.

"Why is he so sleepy?" Shippo asked.

"Miroku tired him out," Naraku answered.

"It's not my fault! I mean for a demon he has no stamina."

"Shut up monk. Now you don't get to go any where near my fluffy."

"Damn!"

Sesshomaru laid his fluffy on the ground and snuggled up to it. Within moments, he had fallen asleep. Shrugging, Inuyasha took a seat on the ground. Naraku and Miroku laid down as well.

"I wonder when their going to wake up," the houshi said.

"Dunno," Naraku answered. "Hopefully never. Then it will be two less people I have to kill and torment."

Inuyasha and Miroku glared.

"I mean err…I hope they wake up any moment now!"

"You are such a bad liar," Miroku mumbled.

"No I'm not! I happen to be a good liar. How old do you think I am?"

"Fifty years old," Inuyasha said.

"Do I look fifty?"

"No, but do I?" Inuyasha asked.

"He's got you there," Miroku said.

"But that's not fair! He was pinned to a tree for fifty years, so it doesn't count."

"You really are such a whiner!" Inuyasha said.

"Oh shut up! I'm going to kill you all soon anyway."

"Sure you are," Miroku said.

"I am."

"Uh-huh. Whatever."

"I swear I will."

"Sure!"

"I will kill you all and do the electric slide on your grave! And the moon walk!"

"You know the moon walk?" Inuyahsa inquired.

"Err…no!"

"You know what Naraku, sometimes, I really do worry about you."

"Do not worry about me monk. I'm evil, remember? You shouldn't worry about me."

Inuyasha rolled his eyes. "Nighty-nighty Nary-chan."

"Sleep tight Inu-kun," he replied.

"Don't let the bed bugs bite. Or err…whatever is in the forest at night…"

"Would you three bakas go to sleep already?" Sesshomaru growled.

"Yes mommy!" they all replied and quickly shut their eyes.

The youkai smiled to himself. "I'm so glad their obedient." He then drifted off to sleep.

Kagome and Sango woke up a little while later. They saw all four of the men asleep and exchanged glances.

"What do you think happened?" Sango questioned.

"I have no idea," Kagome answered. "I just hope that we never have to go through another idiotic one shot like this again!"

"Tell me about it! I don't know how much more of that I could take…"

"So…want to go do something?"

"Like what?"

"Um…pick up where Miroku and Sesshomaru left off in tormenting the squirrels?"

"Sounds like a plan!" Sango replied. The two girls smiled and ran off to go torture the squirrels, among other fuzzy woodland creatures.

* * *

/1/: I was talking to my friend (you know who you are, baka-san) on the phone one night, and she was playing with her cat. I asked her something, I don't know, I forget what, and she replied, "I don't love him. I just like to pet and stroke him." I'm a pervert, so I found it very funny, and had to put it in the fic!

All right! And that's that of the sequel to Mine is Bigger. I wasn't planning on writing this, but I got so many kind reviews. If you do chose to review this, I have a few things to ask. Do not flame at me because this is stupid and sick, because I warned you at the beginning baka! Also, I don't know if the PG-13 rating is too harsh. I think it's right, but I'm not really sure, so if anyone could tell me what you think, it's appreciated!

Inuyasha- Why did you have to write a sequel?

Naraku- Wasn't the first thing bad enough?

Miroku- You make me sound like such a perv in this story!

Fluffy- You are a perv!

Miroku- No I'm not!

Fluff- Yes you are!

(rolls eyes) Hey Fluff, Miroku, do you guys want to sing again?

Naraku and Inuyasha- NO!

Miroku and Fluff- YES!

OH…WE…WOULD…LIKE…TO…

THANK ALL OF YOU WHO REVIEWED THE FIRST RETARDED STORY!

WE HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS SEQUEL AND DID NOT FIND IT BORING!

IT WAS REALLY STUPID, DUMB, PERVERTED AND IDIOTIC!

BUT REVIEW IT ANYWAY, THOUGH IT DEFINES ALL LOGIC!

Right…I'm a bad ryhmer. Review, if you want. I personally think this is a sucky sequel. Now flames please. I don't write 'em, I don't accept 'em!

Miroku and Fluff- (still singing in back ground)

OH HOW WE LOVE TO READ REVIEWS, THEIR JUST SO MUCH FUN!

WE RE-READ THEM A THOUSAND TIMES AND ANNOY INU-KUN!


End file.
